Something happened during the few months that we missed church while Honey recuperated from his concussion. Church no longer feels like a priority for me, and I no longer feel like our church is really our church. It was inevitable really, because I have struggled with those feelings for some time now.
Honey still doesn’t remember some of the members, which makes things extremely uncomfortable during the traditional “Passing of the Peace” portion of our service. Imagine if a total stranger embraced you, kissed you on the cheek, and told you they loved you. He deals with his discomfort by running from it – to the restroom or to the car – while I do my best to deal with the questions that get thrown my way in his absence.
Here we are five years after first attending services at the church we ultimately joined in 2009, and instead of thinking, “Maybe we returned too soon,” I’m thinking, “Maybe we shouldn’t have returned at all.”